Arghhhh anxiety fuck off!!!!!!!!
Must not let anxiety get the better of me and ruin my trip.
Must try and sleep as I finished work at 10pm and have to be there again at 6.30am.
Must finish packing tomorrow.
Must do the breathing and relaxation methods my hypnotherapist taught me.
Must not cry because I’m scared.
Must enjoy myself on holiday, not worry about what may happen because it probably won’t happen. (Definitely won’t happen if I don’t think about it.)
Must be positive.
Just went to hypnotherapy again. For the first time since I booked America, I felt nothing but excitement, when before it was excitement mixed with anxiety. I am so calm right now it’s insane. She’s also created my “happy place” - which just happens to be Diani Beach and Forty Thieves Beach Bar in Kenya… I full blown felt like I was there again. It was weird. I could feel the sand, could feel heat, could feel the atmosphere, i remember every single detail of that place. Today I was standing on the left of the entrance by the pool tables and sofas that are so low they’re basically cushions on the floor, yellow and stripey, near the toilets, right near the sandy steps that lead to the main bar on the right and the beach directly infront… I miss going there every weekend for the whole day and night for 2 months. I need to be back there.
Anxiety, now is not the time!